Its really ok to be in love and never be loved. It doesn't mean anything more than that. We move on and when we do its by virtue of demystifying that which we once mystified. Perfect closing to an imperfect feeling. Ciao. Im happy to have been there for a moment and happy to have left forever. True colors get shown. The utter lack of grace is bestowed. The toxic nature of it becomes reality. And the deer that was trapped finally escapes. Leaving the ugly beauty of that once mysterious life with goodbye to hopefully find grace but likely never to find humility.
We are all fallen creatures first and foremost, and then we are all primal instinctual, and anything we add to it after that is about image and pride. We pick the people in our lives that reflect what our ego's determine is our worth. We make the choices in our lives based on the same. Our deepest self image will come out. Love of self will be portrayed in love for others. Hate for self will be portrayed in hate for others. Neither of which is to be confused with disagreement or cooperation.
Though I know that love is lost now and forever, I needed to tell it only to close out that nagging need, you know the one thing that nags at the back of your mind and you finally figure it out. You know how you'll forget a thought in a conversation and days later you remember it and call that person up who you were talking to just to tell them that bit of information you had suddenly forgot. Well I guess this is just similar only in that it was a bit of information I could never explain, and I'm just wrapping up that loose end.
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